Saturday Night In The City

You do not fit into the "date night in the city" slot and your alternative options might include watching the hockey final, going to a Yoga class for seniors or doing laundry so when an unexpected invitation to BINGO arrives you find yourself actually considering accepting, it's not as if you were up for scintillating conversation anyway, so why not?? You manage to get to the hall, purchase a dabber, get your stack of game sheets and find a spot all before the 2nd number has been called. For the next 2 hours or so you find yourself in a dabbing frenzy, grateful for both the loudspeakers and clear voices of the callers. You may even fantasize about winning the $4000.00 pot, but for the mostpart you become part of an eclectic crowd who knows just what it is doing. If people watching is for you, then make tracks for your local Bingo hall which is sure to offer all ages, all sizes and shapes and an incredible variety of personalities some of whom invariably end up at your table. You will be pleased with the small snack bar that offers everything from a Philly steak special for a mere $6.50 to a small cheesburger for only $2.62. You can certainly eat, drink and be merry for the same price as a movie, and never feel that on Saturday night, you are out of the loop.

For B.D.L.

When we get old enough to marry and start our families we may think we have become adults but at some point we recognize that to our parents even many moons after we have made them grandparents, we remain children.



You know that you are more or less all grown up when your perceptions undergo a radical shift and you find yourself more concerned with the type of daughter you are than the type of father your dad is. There is a silent starting line that you cross where the daughtering begins in earnest and this allows for your father to become more of a friend and less of a parent while stiill remaining "Dad". The propriety parameters once so distinguishable, change into blurred shadows so that you are never again simply daughter and dad. Your relationship grows on so many levels that although you may look back and be lucky enough to say unequivocably that you had the best dad growing up, you know that what you recall is only one dimensional when compared to what you have had these past years. Who could have predicted that aside from your other half, you would be able to call your father your best friend? One day you will see that you will forever have this special bond and that neither absence nor time will ever be able to break it: when you do, you will finally know what your dad knows and has always known; he has the best daughter/friend.

The First Sleep Over

You have been waiting for this moment since your first meeting and now that the invite has come, it is interesting to note how you really feel on the eve of this momentous occasion; flattered that an invitation has been received, relieved that you are in fact in a canoe and not alone in a kayak, a bit nervous, but a good kind of nervous and most definitely optimistic. What you know for certain is that you will not be driving all the way back from Waterloo tomorrow night and that alone has the power to lift your spirits . Now might be a good time to perhaps check into the condition of your sleepover attire. You must be sure that what gets packed into your oh so discreet weekender is in pristine condition. Crisp cotton pajamas must make an appearance even though you are used to sleeping in less 'formal' garb..( you are saving on a hotel so in the absence of the required 200 thread count pajamas, spring for a pair as you know this is an excellent investment) bathrobe has to be soft, fuzzy, cozy and clean, the same criteria applies to the slippers. ( remember to leave the 'orthotics' in your shoes and not transfer them to your slippers!) Your toothbrush should be new and your hairbrush clean. You must remember to audibly close the door behind you after saying goodnight to be sure you are perceived as appreciative, trustworthy and honourable. You should make every effort not to snore and/or do anything noisy that could prevent a second invitation from being extended.

Number Three Bites The Dust

After an auspicious beginning our valiant dating warrior has narrowed the field and decided to stick with Number One. It can't have been easy to give Number Three the gate but truth be told, if one is to be at all honourable, it had to be done. When considering a relationship it is always wise to assess the growth potential in order to get a truer vision of how things might unfold were you to pursue this avenue....other peoples children can be a sticky point, so you need to decide; you either want them or you don't and the faster you make up your mind, the better, before things go too far and you are like Hansel and Gretel lost without a way back. The kindest way is to shower her with praise and to voice your admiration for how devoted she is as a parent. Then you should remind her -from your own personal experience of course- of how time consuming this matter of single parenting can be making sure to embelish the facts so that even a blind person would clearly see that you are not into it even for the short haul.. If all that she does for her family is deemed so much more important than beginning a relationship with you, she will come away from the "kiss off" meeting feeling only good about herself and you have successfully extricated yourself from a probable disaster with nary a trace of scar tissue!

Second Job

Despite the fact that you have a full time job and no monumental financial woes, you might be interested in a second form of employ provided that it is nothing at all like your first. To broaden your scope and keep you from getting stale, second jobs although they tend to pay considerably less, are perhaps just what the doctor ordered. You get to interact with new people and as such your working environment is akin to being on a honeymoon where everything is new and you are not yet jaded. You are on your best behaviour with an eye toward appearing both interesting and interested so your productivity rate is elevated and your attitude positive.....for the mostpart. You do things at job number two that are almost diametrically opposed to what comprises your daily routine in job number one so that the usual workplace ennui doen't get a chance to surface. This second job is all well and good in the beginning but can become problematic with the passing of time. You will know that the time has come to look into giving your notice when job number two begins to feel like job number one on a really bad day; when your "new" co-workers pull ahead in the 'hard to get along with' race and stop being fun; when your 'new' boss starts to look like your old boss only with bigger horns; when the commute ceases to be an adventure in seeing the big city and turns out to be too time consuming and the new dress code offends your sense of individuality. The second job is like an interlude and while you are free to try it on, you must know that it is almost always temporary. You will be certain that it is over when your everyday colleagues, the same ones you complain bitterly about, start to look good and when you decide that it might be nice to sleep until 9:00 at least one day a week!

Surprise 50th

When planning a milestone birthday for that someone special in your life, why not forgo the old, stuffy, tried and true usual venues and/or the new "trendy" venues where one upmanship and innane gimmicks can easily cause you to lose sight of the essential reasons for the celebration. Go for a surprise party complete with a marching band, balloons and all the trimmings. Granted, this may sound too simple but consider the FUN quotient as you and your guests get to dress up and become the members of the band. Aside from the satisfaction you will derive from seeing Birthday Boy's genuine surprise, you get to fulfill your dream of becoming a performer! There is no intimacy in a restaurant party where you are pretty well stuck between and opposite the same small group all evening, and how many trips can you take to the restroom without people catching on to the fact that in your opinion the conversation has either dried up like a raisin in the sun with no chance of revival or your hearing loss has kicked in? Far better to surprise Birthday Boy at work when he least expects a throng of his nearest and dearest to cross the threshold of his store marching to their own beat bearing great bunches of helium balloons, the de rigeur gourmet food platters, a touch of bubbly and caring little for any innocent customers who get in the way. Happy 50th Mr. R.

You Were Wrong To Delay

It is always a pleasant surprise when you find out that doing something you were certain held no appeal whatsoever, is in fact not the ordeal you had been dreading. What can be even more surprising is how unbeknownst to you, your opinion has shifted to such a degree that once you actually get to it, you derive pleasure from what you had previously shifed to the back burner. Writing a blog can certainly cause feelings of trepidation but only around the areas of subject matter and content because of course you never really doubt your ability to express youreslf much do you? As daunting as writing a daily blog can be, once you find your rhythm it becomes less frightening whereas if you do the occasional piece of writing but have signed on for a certain number of postings you become the King/Queen of excuses; not today, too tired, no great ideas, cat has worms, first day of the soccer season, hot weekend date, tickets for the theatre, new restaurant to try or the old standby, my computer is in the shop! (mine REALLY is in the shop) Writing affords you the luxury of small forays into your past and allows you on some mysterious level to relive a moment that you have not thought about in eons, a moment that shines and whose brilliance you would not be seeing again anytime soon were it not for the writing. For me, this is enough of a reason to write as often as I can.