From Sand Trap To Sand Trap

The name of this blog may bring to mind the lyrics "from sea to shining sea" but the reality that inspires my title is much less majestic, much less pastoral. It is in fact what happens when you do not maintain a proper stance while addressing that infamous little fluorescent mini globe known everywhere as a golf ball. On a hole where there are at least 5 different sand traps what are the odds that I'd gain such seemingly effortless entry to each? Actually the odds were in my favour and I managed to do just that. It was like playing a new age game of hopscotch as I wound up for the swing and propelled that little shocking pink orb into all dunes newly swept by the groundskeeper who literally had to run for cover when I hit bunker number 3. I offered to trade places with him and take over grooming the traps but was informed that he "isn't great at golf". I on the other hand know that I am great at playing in the sand.

When in/at Panama

When you go "home" for a visit despite not having lived in that city for at least 35 years, you will almost always meet someone you knew but it's so much better when that happens and there is genuine pleasure and even an element of surprise in the meeting. Last night out to dinner with Mom and family friends, I met someone who I had the most occasion to see when he was a little boy. Aside from no immediate recognition on my part (how on earth could he know this much older version of me??) when my brain finally did catch up to what I had already known- he was a married father- I still found it a touch surreal that here he was with his wife talking about their daughters travel plans while I was still getting used to the time warp that surely must be at the root of his 'catching up' to his sister and me in terms of growing up! Youngest brothers adored by older sisters cannot remain little boys forever but there was something special about this 'adult' little brother and that mysterious 'something' brought me back to a time when everything was ahead and regrets were for the mostpart innane and few. I think that meeting this young couple has made me appreciate how lucky I am. My regret chart isn't full yet and I still have much to look forward to. All lessons aside though, as I said, it is always much better to run into someone you are truly happy to re-meet, and so it was for me last night.

Get A Grip

When is it ok to get emotional in public? When you win a Nobel Peace Prize or maybe during the photo op when you win big at the lottery game? Or is it perhaps possible that emotions are best left at home to be taken out whenever you are alone or with close family members who won't feel ackward as you bare all your innards. I am not talking about seething anger, an emotion not always welcome in the public arena but certainly understood if the provocation is proven to be top notch. This does not mean that you may respond in anger while operating a vehicle or piloting a plane although it does mean that sometimes in the workplace there are provocateurs who really do need a hefty dose of your pent up frustration (which only exisits because of them)to finally be released directly back at them in the form of 'put you in your place I won't take this anymore' controlled but devastating, feel great (to you) payback anger. Now that we've dealt with the anger let's look at the flip side... the crybaby who feels an innate need to let all his personal grief, guilt and any other manner of neuroses which had heretofore lain more or less dormant come bubbling to the surface in any public arena no matter how inappropriate the venue...This is the consummate emotional wreck who really has no business being in any public arenas whatsoever until intense therapy has taught him how to manage his many needs and moods without drawing the innocent into the fray of his web of hysteria or self-aggrandization. The crier has been known to elicit all manner of responses from people unexpectedly on the receiving end of this emotional roller coaster gone wildly out of control. In fact these overzealous kleenex addicts get better and better at 'pulling the wool etc" than a family pack of Australian sheep herders. We must be ever vigilant and never succumb to this well rehearsed camouflage. If you get a chance to say to one of these lost souls, "get a grip!" and they do, it will be a miracle. If the 'get a grip' advisory doesn't work, and if you care, get them to a good facility.

See-Saw

There comes a time although we may fight it, when we need to relinquish our optimistic take on childish games in much the same way that we've given up on regular visits to the playground sections at the park. There are so many instances in life that recall the see-saws we loved to go on as children, and it is probably that fondly remembered up and down ride that prevents us from stamping out the non-wonderful see-saw experiences that seem to be everywhere in our adult lives. Our memories are sun-dappled and remain untarnished so it is not easy to ward off the rides that are nothing like our sepia hued past experiences at the playground. The simplest way to end the newer type of ride that can only end badly-not unlike those rare instances where your "supposed" best friend left you high up in the air only to drop you suddenly with little fanfare and a resounding painful boom- is to refuse to get on. The power of just saying "no" is great enough to protect from any and/or all types of sudden unexpected let downs and does wonders for keeping your
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Parents And Children by guest writer Sophia

What is the issue on parents and children? Is it fair for adults to boss children around, maybe not but children have to deal with it. So sometimes kids get pushed around and sometimes they are told to do something they don't want to do. Most of the time the parents make the right decission and the kids end up making the wrong one, but don't you think that once in a while the parents should just let the kid do what they want and have them make the wrong decision. It is really unhealthy for the kid to not be able to make their own decisions, because later in life they're not going to have their parents say "honey you can't do that you have to do this" They are on their own. So through their childhood you need to mix in the occasional okay honey. Even if they make the wrong decision they have to learn from their mistakes.

When Dad won't Listen For Sophia

How does a 12 year old child make her father listen. It's not that he cannot hear what she says, it is that he chooses to disregard and in so doing he is unable to correct a behaviour that causes her consternation. It is totally within his power to change and actually he would be demonstrating a non stubborn streak which would be a really good thing but it's as if he can't see the forest for the trees. The fact that he sees his daughter as headstrong and/or stubborn is the perfect instance where the apples don't fall far from the.........

Not 60 Yet

Somehow entering my 60th year is a lot less traumatic than my next birthday will be, at least this is what I think today when scotch drunk in celebration fails to result in any numbing and the absence of a cake doesn't phase me one bit. Something has to give so I assume that I am saving my angst for next April. This is in fact a plan as why should I summon up perfectly good angst until I really need it? Dinner with great live music and excellent company has made today just perfect and that along with not yet being 60 makes this birthday the best in a long time.